| Mortification |
| O divine
Lawgiver, I take
shame to myself for open
violations to thy law, for my secret faults, my omissions of duty, my unprofitable attendance upon means of grace, my carnality in worshipping thee, and all the sins of my holy
things. My iniquities are
increased over my head: My trespasses are
known in the heavens, and there Christ is gone also, my Advocate with the
Father, my propitiation for
sins, and I hear his word of peace. At present it is a
day of small things with me, I have light enough to see my
darkness, sensibility enough to feel the
hardness of my heart, spirituality enough to mourn my want
of a heavenly mind; but I might have had more, I ought to have had
more, I have never been
straitened in thee, thou hast always
placed before me an infinite
fullness, and I have not taken
it. I confess and bewail
my deficiencies and backslidings: I mourn my
numberless failures, my incorrigibility under rebukes, my want of profiting under
ordinances of mercy, my neglect of opportunities for
usefulness. It is not with me as
in months past; O recall me to thyself,
and enable me to feel my first love. May my improvements
correspond with my privileges, May my will accept
the decisions of my judgement, my choice be that which
conscience approves, and may I never condemn myself in the things I
allow! |